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What’s your Excuse?

By • Feb 20th, 2008 • Category: Featured Articles, Lifestyle Choices, Personal Development, Self-Esteem

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No ExcusesAs a person who believes in, talks, reads and writes about ways to define and achieve those positive changes, I’m often saddened when someone makes too many excuses for not inching their way towards the positive changes they say that they want.

Some people can be fairly articulate about what they want whether it is simple or grand. Even if what they want seems unrealistic, they are still willing and excited to describe it. And more important, they may have already started to implement their plans to move forward or are eager to begin. They are determined to see their envisioned changes materialize.

Then there are those on the other side of the street. They are more interested in talking about why they can’t change than why they can. And while I acknowledge that we all have challenges, hurdles and obstacles to navigate and negotiate along our path (some more than others), most reasons (for not doing something) are in fact, excuses in disguise.

Have you been using the following three common excuses as reasons for not taking steps to implement positive changes in your life?

Nobody wants to help me 

No one owes you anything, really. You owe yourself something though. You owe it to yourself first to pry yourself out of the pity trap and claw your way up from the bottom of the barrel of dependence. I’m not saying that these movements are easy or simple. It takes work and more often than not, hard, soul-searching work. But if you want to do something with your life other than complain, gripe and fret, don’t you think it’s worth it to make definitive decisions and take firm actions?  

Life’s not fair

I want to tell you that it isn’t about fair! It’s about dealing with life… and coping with our ever-changing, unpredictable world and every confusing, heartbreaking, disappointing, traumatic and painful event that happens. It’s not a matter of fair, it’s a matter of trusting God to see you through even the most soul-twisting tragedy.

I’ll tell you this though. If you want to go through life singing the same old song about how hard, deprived and sub-standard your life is, you can expect to end up in much the same way you began, with the same “poor me’ look on your face, the same slouch in your shoulders, the same defeated attitude and none of the positive changes you talked about. And, if you dare to look up your will see countless others who have taken as much or more of a beating than you have and their attitude, posture and enthusiasm will be soaring. 

Have you ever met someone who always seems to be on the brink of or engaged in some change in his or her life? People like that may have little talent, limited resources and no support system. But, they succeed at their endeavors because they sport a heart that cherishes the smallest blessings, an ability to zero in on what they want most passionately, a great attitude, an unparalleled determination and a remarkable eagerness to learn, change and grow. No matter how bruised and battered they are, they tend their wounds, strengthen their resolve, limp until they can walk again and off they go. 

I don’t have time

Of course you do. You don’t have to make time. Thankfully it’s been given to you already. You have the same number of hours in each day as everyone else. Learning to manage the time at your disposal is the key to relinquishing this excuse and accomplishing your goals. 

We are masters at wasting time; watching television for hours on end, playing computer games, aimlessly surfing the internet, engaging in frivolous and unproductive chats on the phone or on website forums, time consuming texting on cell phones, partying and hanging out with friends and countless other activities.

Moderation in all things makes for a balanced life. A little of this and a little of that, once they are all good practices allows us to enjoy the best things life has to offer. But very often it takes more than moderation to get us to the point we want to reach. Compromises and sacrifices however are the foundations upon which we mount the blocks of change that ensure a life well-lived. 

I don’t write in a vacuum or from a place of perfection. I could accomplish much more in my writing career, but time management continues to be a tough issue for me. Sacrificing two additional hours every night could make all the difference in how fast I finish writing my books, building a website and designing writing courses.

Where can you make compromises and sacrifices to get the time you need for the things you want to do?

Do you really want to make changes? Have you been whining, complaining, rationalizing and justifying why you have not made one move towards making them a reality? Are you hedging and hawing with weak excuses?  Don’t live your life swirling around in the vicious cycle of blame, excuses and talk without action. If you want any change bad enough, prove it. Flush your excuses to make way for the positive changes you long to see.

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