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4 Steps to Starting Over

By • Nov 20th, 2007 • Category: Featured Articles, Personal Development

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photo by Dude Crush (license)

It has been said that life is not a bed of roses, but it is. At first glance, its beauty and fragrance literally takes your breath away. However, it hides the thorns that can cut deep. Such is life. The sting of pain, disappointment, tragedy and betrayal hides beneath and among the awe-inspiring wonder and joys of life.

Frequently, the individuals and situations we encounter in our lives may demand that we reconsider the direction in which we are headed. In fact, we may have no choice but to come to a dead stop and do a full overhaul of ourselves and our lives.

We all encounter circumstances that cause us to stumble. Thankfully sometimes, we catch our balance and stay on our feet. Others throw us for a loop, we loose our footing and that’s it. Down we go. Despite our best efforts to stay in control, we crash helplessly to the ground, landing on our faces. Then embarrassed and injured we have to pick ourselves up from where we have fallen. We have to shake off the dust, wash of the mud and scrub off the grime. We have to mend our wounded pride, tend our wounds and start all over again.

But that too, is all part of the challenge and beauty of life.

Starting over is frightening. “From the beginning?" we ask with a childish whine in our voice. Nevertheless, we have to revamp our ways of thinking and choose a new motto and mantra that will inspire and motivate us everyday even as we face the challenges involved.

Although difficult, starting over is sometimes necessary and often it is the only way for us to regain some measure of sanity, direction and meaning in our lives. Whatever the circumstances that force us to start over, we must find ways to do so. It might be the best thing we could do for ourselves.

I agree that the injuries from a fall can leave lifelong scars and lingering fears. Additionally, when we least expect it, the memories replay like a bad movie, frighten us all over again and threaten to derail our best efforts to move on. When undoing what had happened is an impossible dream, we must resist the temptation to soak in the bathtub of pain and regret while the bubbles of despair steadily grows and engulfs us.

If you are ready to start over, here are some options to help you:

Refresh your faith.

Maybe you allowed your core beliefs to dry up and harden as you slowly drifted away over the years. Pull them to the surface. What do you really believe? How has your faith buoyed you up in the past? Refresh it. Start from the beginning again, if you must because it is the foundation that will keep you grounded and centered. Spread it like creamy butter over your heart. Inhale it and drink it in so that every thought, word and deed is affected.

Re-position your focus.

Look at this chance to start over as being full of possibilities and opportunities. Do you want to pursue the same goals you had before? You may need to devise a new strategy for moving forward. Maybe a new direction makes more sense to you. If so, explore the idea on paper. It will be easier to map out an action plan to take you there. Acknowledge the likely worse case scenarios but only to consider diversion or solution tactics. Then move on quickly to the positive and systematic steps you could take to succeed.

Re-educate yourself.

Do you intend to make a second try at your initial goal? Why not upgrade your qualifications? Kick it up a notch for a professional edge. More importantly, up the ante for your own satisfaction and personal development.

Since you’re never too old to start over, as so many people continue to prove, don’t shy away from re-inventing or re-equipping yourself for a whole new adventure.

Rev up your self-confidence.

Belief in your God-given ability to accomplish your goals is tantamount to successfully navigating through and away from life’s tidal waves. Don’t surrender to the negative self-talk playing in your head. Devise ways to top-up your confidence a little, every day. You know how, start your day with a quiet devotional time of prayer, reading and meditation. Plan your day, review your goals, and leave home with the “can-do” attitude we’ve talked about before.

We can liken our lives to a mountainside that is lush and green. After it has been ravaged by a fierce fire, only a black wasteland remains. Naturally, it is disheartening and restoration may seem almost impossible. But in time, the green tips of plant life begin to peep out from the desolation. In the same way, sometimes our lives are burnt and desolate and we are covered with the ash of despair. The green tips of a new life can emerge again.

Presently you may be in a dark place, going through a rough patch, stumbling through a long, dark tunnel, or lying face down in the mud. However you describe it you can not stay there, you must not. No matter what has floored you, garner your faith, confidence, focus and determination and start over.

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One Response »

  1. Your thoughts are uplifting, punchy and get ‘right-to-the-point.’ I also like the photos you incorporate into your blog entries. Do you choose them randomly or perhaps know the photographers? Great to see you have discovered the Dreambuilders Australia blog.

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